WALDO'S RUNNING MATE

MISS CINDY,

I OFFERED THE JOB OF VICE PRESIDENT TO MISS BUTTONS. SHE DECLINED AND WANTED THE TOP ADVISOR POSITION. THESE ARE THE REASONS FOR THE VARIOUS APPOINTMENTS.

I AM A STRONG ATHELIC BOY WHO LOVES TO RUN, PLAY, AND WATCH FOOTBALL. THE GUYS OUT THERE LOVE THIS. I AM NATURALLY GOOD LOOKING, SO I KNOW THE WORKING WOMEN LOVE ME. THEY RECOGIZE BRAWN AND BRAINS.

JUSTICE IS A PRETTY BOY. HE HAS THAT BABY FACE THAT YOUNG AND OLDER WOMEN FALL IN LOVE WITH AT FIRST SIGHT. HE WOULD ALSO BE SO GOOD AT STEALING VOTES FROM THE OTHER SIDE.

MISS BUTTONS, WILL BE PRIVY TO ALL ACTIONS. SHE WILL NOT BE SUBJECTED TO THE PRESS HOUNDING HER AND THIS WILL GIVE HER MORE LEEWAY IN MAKING THE REALLY TOUGH DEALS. SHE ALSO KNOWS THAT AS WITH ANY PRESIDENT, THE WOMAN BEHIND THE MAN REALLY STEERS THE BOAT. WITH MY FIRST LADY, GRACIE, HOPEFULLY BEING PREGNANT AND THEN CONTENDING WITH RAISING MY CHILDREN CORRECTLY, GRACIE WILL HAVE HER PAWS FULL.

ZIPPER HAS REALLY STRONG IDEAS WHEN IT COMES TO DEALING WITH THE TERRORISTS. SHE DOES NOT TOLERATE ANY FOOLISHNESS. THIS COUNTRY IS NUMBER ONE IN HER HEART AND MIND AND SHE INTENDS TO PROTECT IT WITH ALL HER MIGHT. SHE SAYS SHE HAS NO PROBLEM WITH DEALING WITH STEALTH BOMBERS OR ROUGH ARTILLERY. SHE WILL FIGHT TO HAVE OUR TROOPS IN THE MOST UP TO DATE WEAPONS AND TRAINING. SHE WILL FIGHT FOR THEM TO HAVE THE ULTIMATE CARE FOR THEIR FAMILIES. BASICALLY, ZIPPER IS THE SUPER TROOPER WE ALL DREAMED OF AS CHILDREN.

SECRETARY OF COMMERCE IS GOING TO BE ETHEL. SHE IS SO GOOD WITH BUDGETS. SHE KNOWS ABOUT THE COSTS OF BONES, COOKIES, AND CHOW. BUT MOST IMPORTANT, SHE KNOWS THIS ECONOMY NEEDS A MAJOR BOOST, AND GETTING MORE CHEESEBURGER PLACES OUT THERE WILL HELP THIS.

LUCY AS SECRETARY OF STATE WILL DO AN EXCELLENT JOB WITH KEEPING THE RICHLY PAID LOBBYIST IN LINE. SHE WILL STRICTLY ENFORCE THE ELECTIONS LAWS. NO BODY WILL HAVE THE CHANCE TO LIE ON THEIR RECORDS. BASICALLY, SHE WILL BE THE WATCHDOG THAT WILL KEEP THE DIRTY SCOUNDRELS IN LINE WITH THE LAW. SHE HAS SOME PRETTY SNEEKY LITTLE YORKIES THAT ARE GOOD AT SNOOPING.

WELL, I HAVE TO GET GOING, I THINK I HAVE SOME PUPPIES TO KISS THIS MORNING AT A MOM RALLY.

CANDIDATE WALDO FOR PRESIDENT